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Sunday, April 28, 2013

More Tails on the Terlingua Porch



This is a true conversation. Only the names and some details have been changed to protect the innocent (or maybe the guilty.)

Setting: On the Porch of the Terlingua General Store, sometime early on a hot summer Sunday morning. The usual locals are sitting around chewing their breakfast beers. The usual dogs are lolling about on the porch floor.

Patron #1: Did you see the cops come drivin' up into the parking lot last night, chasin' a feller?

Patron #2: No. I left early.

Patron #1: Well, it was around 6pm or so. The guy come drivin' up at TWO MILES AN HOUR, and there are the police, just chasin' him that slowly. They gets to the parking lot and he gets out and ambles out around back o' the shed over there.

Patron #2: Two miles an hour? Whyever for?

Patron #1: Can't say. Maybe he was trying to convince everyone he warn't doin' nothin' wrong. But anyways, he goes out behind the shed, and they follered him. Then all of a sudden old Ben comes runnin' out from the clinic shouting, “They TASED him! They TASED him!”

Patron #2: Tasers?

Patron #1: Yep, sure enough. Ben says he saw it himself. They tased the kid.

Patron #2: That seems a might extreme for just drivin' two miles an hour.

Patron #1: Well, you knowed it wasn't just that. Hell, young Sam's done this before.

Storekeep: Sam? It was Sam?  I drove by his place last night and didn't see no light, figgered he wasn't home and wondered why. That 'splains it.

Patron #1: Yep, well you know young Sam did this same kinda thing a month or two ago.

Patron #2: I heered about that. He saw the state troopers and decided to have a little fun. He wheeled off over a hunnerd miles an hour, crashed a few fences, out over a field.

Patron #1: Not just that. He smashed the tour company's jeep, then almost hit one of the cop cars. Laughing the whole time, they said.

Patron #2: I guess they weren't much happy 'bout that.

Patron #1: Well, 'specially since he gave 'em the slip that time. So figure they was out to git him this time.

Patron #2: See what I mean?

Patron #1: What's that?

Patron #2: They's too many danged PO-lice around these parts anymore.

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